Perfectly Imperfect

There's a  children's song that Joshua likes that's called "I'm Not Perfect." The words to it  "I'm not perfect, no I'm not, I'm not perfect but I've got what I've got." seem so fitting when Joshua sings them. Luke and I have often joked with him upon hearing him singing along, and said no, you're not perfect are you.

None of us are perfect. I for sure am not. I often think of the verse Romans 7:15 which says. "I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate." Why, when I try my hardest, pray and desire to be the best mother and wife that I possibly can, do I fall so short of that goal. The answer is clear. I'm not perfect. Paul in his letter to the Romans is so honest in describing himself. I too find myself in situations where I do not understand my own actions. Paul's willingness to admit this is so honest. It makes me wonder why so many people hide their true selves behind a mask of perfection. We can easily write this off by saying, "they feel as though no one will accept them for who they are." Isn't it true however, that if you pretend to be something that you are not, people will still not be accepting you for who you are but accept your mask instead, and so the insecurity thrives and grows deeper.

In my own acceptance of imperfection I find comfort in knowing that if I cannot always do what is right or best, at least I can be honest. When Luke and I were first dating one thing I clearly remember him saying to me was, "I at least know what to expect from you, because with you it's always- what you see is what you get." At the time I wasn't so sure that was a compliment. He was trying to tell me that sometimes I'm honest to the point of brutality (which isn't always good). But at least he didn't have to guess at what I was thinking and feel like I would pretend to be something that I am not. I do think of that as a compliment. I try to always be myself no matter what.

This can be tricky, especially as a Pastor's wife since whether we like the idea of it or not, there are certain characteristics that we think Pastor's wives should have. I may not easily fit into the Pastor's wife box, but I do know that I fit into the cross. The place where Jesus gave everything including His life so that even though I'm not perfect I can be accepted by the one that matters the most - God. If God who created everything perfectly can love me and think that I'm valuable, Who am I to argue with Him.

We have no need to lie to others, or to say it another way "mislead" others into thinking that our lives are going perfectly. If I can relate to a man such as Paul who lived almost 2 thousand years ago; I think that it is safe to say everyone can sing along with Joshua and say that they are not perfect. Although I think most can remember a time when they've rattled of a list of disastrous happenings to a friend who in return stated, "Really? Everything's going great for me." I'm sure that you stared at this person in disbelief and I'm also sure that it is safe to say that this person wasn't being completely honest with you.

My family is full of imperfections. We've had days when the kids cried non stop. Days we argued, cried, burned dinner, bought the wrong size, and on a day like today we left the baby formula at home! If we act as though we have everything together we are not admitting our need for Christ. "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." 2 Corinthians 12:9 . In verse 10 Paul continues by saying, "For the sake of Christ I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong." We are all perfectly imperfect.