The TV show Monk was one of mine and Luke's favorites for as long as it aired. Even now when we happen to catch a rerun we sit down and have a good laugh while Tony Shalub cracks the case in his unique way. If you've never seen the show, the main character Mr. Monk has a unique ability to notice things and uses this "gift" to solve murders. He however, is also plagued by this incredible ability and his sensitivity to everything has made him into a Obsessive Compulsive mess. One of our favorite lines from the show is Monk's response whenever he's asked about his crime solving abilities "it's a gift...and a curse" is always his response.
I took Joshua outside this morning and watched him play in the backyard while Jonas was napping. He rode his tricycle, pretended sticks were rockets, chased a bunny around the yard, and rolled around in his sandbox until entirely covered in damp sand. The air outside had a specific crispness to it. The kind of cool peacefulness that occurs every year around August when the backpacks start making their way to front displays at walmart and kids are excitedly looking at their school supply lists.
I breathed in that crisp air and remembered the last time I was in school. I was finishing up my elementary education degree. I thought back on it fondly and then remembered the reality of my last semester on campus. Thousands of lessons plans, term papers, power point presentations, and of course the all time consuming professional portfolio were all things that had to be completed before I could move past the "paperwork" portion of my senor year and get to the student teaching. For a brief moment my chest tightened up and I distinctly remembered all the pressure I felt pushing on me.I loved teaching. When our children are grown and in school I intend to go back to the classroom and reignite my passion for education.
But as I sat watching Joshua this morning I felt so amazingly blessed. The opportunity to be a stay at home mom is such a gift. It's not easy, it's exhausting most days, and we make financial sacrifices that most couples our age would cringe at the thought of, but it is so worth it. It's worth wearing last years jeans, not having the fanciest SUV, and sending most of our paycheck to the insurance company.
When I remembered the stresses of school and thought back on the deadlines of lesson plans and parent teacher conferences I felt truly happy, that for what will seem like a brief moment in the years to come, I had this great opportunity to let watching and guiding my children be my job. I've heard moms on maternity leave say things like "I can't wait to get back to work, I just don't know what to do with my kids all day." Or a mother who worked part time once said to me "When I've had 4 days off in a row I just can't wait to take my kids back to daycare so I don't have to see them all day."
It wasn't easy for me when I first started started staying at home. It was an adjustment for sure to transition from seeing hundreds of people a day to just me and my son, but so worth hanging in there and praying for God to let taking care of my family be the desire of my heart. I pray sincerely that more mothers would let staying at home with their kids be a gift and not a curse.
I had the opportunity to be raised by my mother and my children were given the same opportunity. I think it's important for so many reasons. Certainly, the children will pick up the values of their mother, and I think children will also one day appreciate the sacrifices that were made for them. However, having said that, I also realize that some families simply cannot afford to have one of the parents stay home.
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